ebookland Chapter 139 The Fear Deep in My Heart
Chapter 139 The Fear Deep in My Heart
"Why do you think so?"
Of course Shen Ruoyan knew that the baby in Zhuhong's belly was not Lu Jing's.
But how did this kid Lu Yan know about this?
She didn't show shock, but she was surprised in her heart. At such a young age, if there were no one beside him to instigate it, it would be really shocking.
Seeing that his mother was not frightened by him, Lu Yan felt relieved a little.
So he picked up his pen and wrote: "Hong Yi Niang has been in the mansion for a long time, but she had never been pregnant before. But she became pregnant after my father went to war. The timing was too coincidental. I heard from the servants that my grandmother didn't believe it at first, and it was only after my mother persuaded her that she accepted it."
As the eldest son of the Marquis's Mansion, Lu Yan knew better than anyone how much his grandmother cared about the interests of the Marquis' Mansion.
When he was still a healthy child, his grandmother devoted all her heart and soul to him, and would never forget him, her good great-grandson, wherever she went.
But later, he became mute, and the person who gave up on him the fastest was his grandmother.
In her eyes, neither she nor her father could compare to the Marquis' Mansion. She had guarded the Marquis' Mansion for her entire life, and no matter what, she would not let anyone destroy the future of the Marquis' Mansion.
Therefore, even though she valued offspring, she also knew how serious it was to confuse the bloodline of the Marquisate.
So when Aunt Hong first revealed that she was pregnant, she was the first one who didn't believe it!
She would never tolerate the dirty bloodline tainting the "good reputation" of the Marquis' Mansion!
But success and failure are both due to Xiao He. Lu Yan thought that the reason why his grandmother could endure it was probably to preserve the reputation of the Marquisate.
After all, if the news that the concubine in the mansion had an affair with an outsider were to spread, then the Changning Marquis Mansion would become a laughing stock in the entire Shengjing City.
The consequences are something the old lady cannot bear.
"Based on these alone, you conclude that the child in Aunt Hong's belly is of illegitimate origin?" Shen Ruoyan didn't want to attack the child, but if that was all, then the evidence was not sufficient.
It only shows that Lu Yan is a thoughtful child who can notice details that others overlook.
But the truth of the matter cannot be determined by intuition alone.
Lu Yan was not panicked. He even looked more stable than many adults. "Father can't do this. I know."
He discovered this as early as when his grandmother hired a doctor for his father.
It should be said that my grandmother thought she was very cautious, especially against the women in the backyard, but she forgot that children should also be guarded against sometimes.
It was precisely because his grandmother had never thought about this matter that he was able to easily sneak into his grandmother's territory.
He told Shen Ruoyan that he had discovered the doctor entering the house and had found an opportunity to hide in the corner and eavesdrop. Therefore, he had already known that his father would never have an heir.
Then it naturally couldn’t be the father’s that Hong Yi Niang was pregnant.
"Mother must have told grandmother that exposing this matter at this time would bring disaster to the reputation of the Marquisate. So grandmother endured it and let Aunt Hong go for the time being." Lu Yan wrote seriously. If someone who didn't know the truth read it, they would think he was writing some important article.
Only Shen Ruoyan was staring at the contents in a trance.
Lu Yan's intelligence was beyond Shen Ruoyan's imagination.
It is hard to describe his sharpness with children. Even many adults cannot compare with him.
Including his analysis of the situation in the mansion, it was to the point. It was not a groundless guess, but was truly well-founded and convincing.
"Yan'er, what do you want to do when you grow up?" At this moment, Shen Ruoyan was really curious. What kind of thoughts would Lu Yan have about the future?
Since the people in the Marquis' Mansion treated him like this, would he want revenge?
Or do you want to be peaceful and far away from all this chaos?
Lu Yan did not start writing immediately, but looked at Shen Ruoyan deeply, "Mother, do you hate it?"
Do you hate these two-faced people, those who make you give your true heart but then trample it under their feet?
After becoming mute, the proud Lu Yan felt as if his wings were broken. He loved flying so much, but he knew clearly that he could no longer fly in the blue sky and could only hide underground, away from the sun.
He has been sad and hateful.
However, when he saw Shen Ruoyan, he felt sorry for his mother.
Compared to myself, my mother has contributed more to this family.
I have been enjoying since I was born, and what I am experiencing now is nothing more than returning all the things I have.
But my mother is different.
She came to the Marquis' Mansion and compromised for her own good. Although she came from a prominent family, she was controlled by her grandmother and was so obedient that she dared not resist at all.
Fortunately, his mother woke up in time, but Lu Yan had not forgotten all the suffering and grievances she had endured in the mansion before - he hated his mother more than he hated himself!
"I just hope that my mother can do what she wants." This is the only hope Lu Yan has for the future.
He didn't want to be a marquis, nor did he want to be a general, and he didn't want to become famous.
He just wanted to protect his mother.
Therefore, he can be a marquis, a general, or even become famous, as long as he has the capital to protect his mother!
The sentence Lu Yan spoke was not long, in fact it was too short compared to Lu Changchuan's.
But Shen Ruoyan had already felt his determination.
If you have a son like this, what else can you ask for?
"I hate it! But my hatred should not become your hatred. It's not fair to you." Shen Ruoyan looked at the child in front of him seriously. His face was still so childish, but his heart was already so tough.
Shen Ruoyan naturally hated it.
She was tortured in the Marquis' Mansion and couldn't even protect her own son, so until her death, Lu Yan was the deepest obsession in her heart.
But she will take revenge!
It’s not that Lu Yan’s intervention is not needed. On the contrary, his cooperation and help may be needed many times in the future.
But Shen Ruoyan doesn't hope so. This is Lu Yan's plan and expectation for the future.
She can do that, but it's not fair to Lu Yan.
"Rather than revenge, I hope you can find your own way. Not as the prince of Changning Marquisate, nor as my son, but as Lu Yan, the real future!"
Shen Ruoyan smiled and reached out her hand, gently touching Lu Yan's head, "Yan'er, this is what I really expect of you."
The touch on my head was filled with an indescribable tenderness.
Lu Yan was stunned.
He thought that his mother would be relieved after he told her the truth, but he didn't expect her to react like this.
In the past, people always said that children are born to repay gratitude.
So he thought, even if he became mute, he could still do things for his mother and relieve her worries.
He didn't dare relax, didn't dare let himself fall - because deep down in his heart, he was afraid of being abandoned.
Especially this person is your own mother.
In the final analysis, Lu Yan's ambitions also stem from his lack of confidence in himself. He is worried that as a mute, his mother will dislike him one day. So in order to prevent that day from coming, he strives to make himself a useful person.
He could accept being rejected by everyone except Shen Ruoyan.
But now Shen Ruoyan told him that he didn't have to work so hard, nor did he have to impose all this hatred on himself.
He just needs to be himself.
After Lu Yan figured it out, he looked up in disbelief, "Is it really possible?"